Your Path to Relationship Success

Let’s talk about relationships. I know something about this subject not because of my formal education but from my life experiences. One of the most important relationship lessons I learned is this: The relationships we have with other people are projections of the relationships we have with ourselves.

Our external relationships is a reflection of our internal relationships are in fact the same relationships. They only seem different because we look at them through different lenses.

Let’s consider why this is true. Where do all your relationships exist? They live in your thoughts. Your relationship with another person is whatever you imagine it to be. Whether you love someone or hate someone, you’re right. Now the other person may have a completely different relationship to you, but understand that your representation of what someone else thinks of you is also part of your thoughts. So your relationship with someone includes what you think of that person and what you believe she or he thinks of you. You can complicate it further by imagining what the other person thinks you think of him/her, but ultimately those internal representations are all you have and can lead to paranoia.

Even if your relationships exist in some objective reality independent of your thoughts, you never have access to the objective viewpoint. You’re always viewing your relationships through the eyes of your consciousness. The closest you can get to being objective is to imagine being objective, but that is in no way the same thing as pure objectivity. That’s because the act of observation requires a conscious observer, which is subjective by its very nature.

At first, it might seem troublesome that you can never hope to gain a truly accurate, 100% objective understanding of your relationships. You can never escape the subjective lens of your consciousness. That would be like trying to find the color blue with a red lens permanently taped over your eyes. That doesn’t stop people from trying, but such attempts are in vain. If you fall into the trap of trying to think of your relationships as external entities that are external to you, you’ll be using an inescapably inaccurate model of reality. Consequently, the likely outcome is that you’ll frustrate yourself to no end when it comes to human relationships. You’ll make relating to other people a lot harder than it needs to be. Intuitively you may know something is off in your approach to relationships, but you’ll remain stuck until you realize that every relationship you have with another person is a relationship that exists entirely within yourself.

Fortunately, once you embrace the subjective nature of relationships, you’ll have a much easier time relating to people.

I would like to introduce you to a path to relationship success. It is always simpler to find your destination if you have a GPS.

I will work with you to help you with the relationships you have with yourself. Then I will make suggestions to assist you to transform the way you relate to others and when you start to come to grips that your relationship issues are an internal matter, not an external one.